ADDERALL > BRAIN

I’ve worried about him all our lives, I guess all I can do is keep hoping he does what’s best for himself and not what other people expect him to do.

I don’t sleep anymore, everything seems hard to accomplish even on the meds, my skin broke out (which affects my career), I never answer my phone (and I am 100% extrovert). My life literally has began to fall apart in short.

My questions/concerns/thoughts in wanting to quit is that I don’t have an office job. I am a performer and director, so I am really worried what would happen with the withdrawl process. Do I need to wait to have a window of time? I am currently in my last week of production of the show I am acting in, and about 6 weeks away from the show I am directing. I can’t skip, zone out or just show up, like some people mentioned with their jobs. Would this require me to take ‘a vacation’? Would people recommend treatment somewhere-I’ve seen all different responses. I, of course, am terrified of weight gain, and find that as one of the big reasons to not wanting to quit. (I did read people’s responses about increase exercise).

Certain things have been so easy with the drug, others now so hard. It seems like an easy choice to quit, but then its not at all, and really like how people said you need to be 100% percent prepared.

Thanks to whoever took the time to write this and thanks to all you awesome people who have written over the years about it.

I think my attention span today is either the same or slightly better, based on a few standards. For example: I was a B student back then, I’m an A student now. I rarely did homework back then, I always do homework now. I would get up from my desk several times an hour back then, only once every couple of hours now. I had no side creative projects back then, and have two very consuming creative projects now (this website was the first of two).

I’m sure some of this is just growing up, but I’ve also done a lot towards figuring out how to work in ways that work for me…if that make sense.

Don’t know if that helped at all. In general, if you were to pit me against my pre-Adderall self in a battle of attention span, I’m pretty sure I would win. But not any huge measure.

Also, my work ethic/attention span is still very much a work in progress. I know 4 years seems like a long time, but I have completely upended and revamped my life in that time. I have many times the responsibilities today than I even had on Adderall.

So if you hear me say something in the vein of “my attention span still isn’t quite where I’d like it to be even after 4 years” keep in mind that I work probably twice the hours now, so my daily attention span is divided across more time.

I cannot stress enough how crucial it is to recognize the return of your emotional range after quitting. The fact that you’ve done that — that you’ve perceived a greater capacity for happiness — will take you far in your quitting process. The worst moments of quitting Adderall often involve unfair comparisons of your on-Adderall life to your after-Adderall life. You compare how you felt on your best Adderall day to how you feel melted into the couch during withdrawal, and the math starts to come out in favor of going back on Adderall…and then you recall those small, deep happinesses you’ve felt a few times since quitting…the scale rebalances, and you push ahead.

I’m glad your boyfriend has seen the Jekyll & Hide shift too. That means he’ll be a huge ally in your battle to quit, because he’s seen the good that can come of it. Where others might not be able to understand what you’re doing, he’ll be able to point out your progress and remind you of your reasons.

Anyhow, very best of luck quitting. And I’m glad you like the site!

If you can’t think of any negative ways that Adderall is affecting his life, then you don’t have much of a case. General arguments like “it’s dangerous” or “it’s unnatural” don’t really work on somebody who feels like the the pill has made them a superstar producer (especially if they’re insecure about producing naturally).

If Adderall is only helping your brother, then there is no reason for him to quit. You shouldn’t push it unless you see immediate, tangible detriment. Don’t go down this road otherwise. If he’s one of the ones who actually needs it, you’ll just confuse and stress him unnecessarily by guilt-tripping him about it.

But if it is clearly holding him back, then remember that Adderall is wrapped tightly around his ego. To unwrap it, you must give his ego a new and damning perspective that it cannot evade forever. As his sister you’re in a good position to come up with such a thing (because you know who he was before the pills, and you know what’s changed), but ultimately it may be a conclusion he has to reach for himself in time.

Good luck!